AP Newswire (Leesport)- Famed southpaw golfer Phil Mickelson announced today a 5 year partnership with the Kirby Puckett Memorial Games. The financial terms of the contract were not disclosed, but are said to be around 3 trays of taco dip and a $50 Sheetz gift card.
Mickelson seemed quite excited for the partnership. "I took a look at the roster for the Games and I feel I have quite a few similarities with the competitors. I have huge man breasts and so do several of the competitors. Anytime a good pair of banana tits show athletic prowess, I want to be involved."
When asked about his rooting interests, "Lefty" was quick with his answer. "The team of Dane, Bauer, and Andy have the nicest set of tits this side of the Mississippi. You gotta love those racks. Plus, I have an immense amount of foreskin, so you know where my allegiance lie."
The Kirby Puckett Memorial Games begin August 23rd, with pre-game coverage starting the night before at 7 PM on BCTV followed by Polka with the Riveredge. All proceeds from the Games go to the Former Dutch Touch Employees of Berks County Assoc. (FDTEBCA)
-AP-
I have too much time on my hands.
3 comments:
You've done this before... I am at a loss for words on how bad this is.
Shouldn't you be in the wilderness alone where no one can make fun of you?
Nah, I just got done training trip leaders to be half as cool as me and then I leave for the St. Regis wilderness on tuesday and I will Return 23 days later and then do it again.
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